“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.” - MLK jr
Yesterday I checked in with a former co-worker to see how things were at the music store. She took over as manager at the same time I left, and I like to hear how things are doing from time to time. She said things were fine, but slow. I asked her how all the employees were doing, and she said that one had quit and one was fired. the one who was fired was one that I often worked with. I knew that while generally a good worker, he was not a favorite of my district and regional manager for a variety of reasons, or at least seemingly so. assuming they had finally just decided to edge him out, I asked why he had been fired. "You didn't hear this from me, but he was caught stealing. $3200 since he started working here"
Wait.
WHAT!?
Him? 40 years old. Family man. Working to help make ends meet. This doesn't make sense. I mean, in some ways it makes MORE sense than the standard kid stealing money out of the till or musician stealing equipment. He was working because his family needed the money. So I'm guessing thats why he stole. I don't really know. I don't know the details or his motivations.
We both closed many, many nights. We would sit and talk and play music. We would joke about the stories in the company newsletter of the people who ALWAYS got caught stealing, and the lame excuses (or lack thereof) they would give. And then this??
I feel a variety of emotions about this. Disappointment for his actions. Sympathy for his consequence. The company always presses charges. Now what will become of him? His family? His life must now be in a degree of shambles. How will he find any decent employment after this? Even if he is only given a simple punitive sentence, it will still follow him.
In a small way I felt personally betrayed. This was someone I vouched for when our new manager came in. Someone I specifically requested my hours be given to when I quit, since his had been suddenly cut back and I knew he was supporting a family. Like I said, we spent a lot of time working together, hanging out, talking. I never suspected a thing or would have thought him capable of this.
Even in retrospect, I am surprised. He never gave any clues. He would talk about how stupid it was for others to have tried stealing. He would talk on and on about karma, about getting back what you put in...I guess he was right..but found himself on the wrong end.
In the end I'm still trying to decide what to take away from it. Am I too soft? Should I be "less understanding" of people and put a little more guard up? I would like to think not, to hope not. To always hope for the best and to find reason for compassion. I want to love mercy more than justice. But there is a balance. Sometimes people need a bit of both. I suppose thats something I'm still learning. I used to be very justice heavy. Now I'm very mercy heavy.
Maybe I'm finding the balance.
